Thankfulness & Gratitude

“But blessed are your eyes, for they see, and your ears, for they hear.” – Matthew 13:16 (ESV)

Thanksgiving this year will have a special meaning for me. My heart is full of gratitude! Gratitude to the Lord for He could have easily called me home this past April, but chose not to.

I’ve been a Christian since childhood, but spent much of my life doing what I wanted for my own gains and pleasure. I’d continuously ignored the quiet prodding of the Holy Spirit to do His bidding as He has a much higher purpose for me.  I knew this – that He had a calling for me, for my writing, but I chose not to let Him have His way with me. I believed that submitting to His will meant I’d lose my sense of self, and sense of true identity. That my life would be doomed to servitude and misery.

I was wrong. So very wrong.

I suffered a heart attack on April 1^st. Cardiologists discovered two major artery blockages in my heart – one was known as the Widowmaker where my survival chance was less than 25%. They were able to successfully place stents into these arteries, but my heart sustained severe damage in the lower left ventricle. But – I am alive. God has given me another chance.

This “near death” experience opened my eyes to the things I purposely closed them against.

The Truth.

Everything is new again for me. I feel like I’m reading the Bible for the first time. Prayer time has taken on a whole new level of meaning. Mere words cannot explain it.

It’s like I’m seeing everything, hearing everything with my eyes and ears wide open – open to what is truly happening, open to the true meaning that most are unable, unwilling to see and hear.

The opening verse of the song, Amazing Grace expresses it best:

Amazing Grace how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found;
Was blind, but now I see.

I’m what you consider deafblind – due to Usher Syndrome – so this song is especially special.  Though my physical eyes and ears do not work very well, my spiritual eyes and ears?

Again, mere words cannot express everything I’m now able to see and hear. But – in the coming days and months, I hope to try.

I am full of gratitude and thankfulness. I hope you will have a Blessed and safe Thanksgiving with those you love.